A few extra things to celebrate this Holiday season:
J had his annual IEP team meeting last month. He did the language testing again that we've used to track his progress since he was 3 years old. He made 2+ years of progress during the last calendar year, and is performing very well in his mainstream Kindergarten classroom this year! Yay!
L continues to score in the low-normal range on her language tests, but fell a little bahind in speech skills. We've been monitoring this, and expected it, so were not disappointed to learn the news. However, a good thing, her lower scores finally qualified her for speech through the state program. She is only doing 2 30 minute segments twice a month, but every little bit helps. She also seems to have decided on her own to start talking anyway, and now makes attempts to imitate me a few times a week. Her vocabulary list is growing steadily now - signing is still much faster than speech, but growth at all in the speech column is an improvement!
A funny side-note: The Christmas season is in full swing at our house, including Christmas music all day, every day. J hears the sleigh bells, or the fun tunes of children's Christmas carols, and asks me to sign what they're singing. This is seriously challenging my limited ASL vocabulary, and speed at which I can interpret! I bet it's pretty funny to sit next to me at a stop light and see this crazy mom signing into the rearview mirror and bouncing around in my seat to a Christmas song!
Tuesday, November 30, 2010
Saturday, May 29, 2010
A growing vocabulary!
It is amazing every day to watch your babies grow and learn. It has been exceptionally amazing and interesting for me, a hearing person, to watch my deaf babies learn. I am astounded at how much they take in with their bright little eyes, and how all of that information comes out later in the form of signs, gestures, and eventually sounds.
L is at that 18 month old, language explosion period. She has a vocabulary of 16 words, and I'm sure there are more we don't understand yet. She speaks 2 words. So, let me clarify, she signs 16+ words... and she's imitating and using more literally every day. I remember when M was at this stage. She said new words pretty frequently, but nothing like the speed with which L is using new signs. She'll sit at the dinner table and copy 4 or 5 new signs as I tell her what she's eating for dinner or what J and M are saying.
So, we'll keep laying this foundation, she'll understand more, we'll be able to tell her more, earlier. and eventually, she'll use her hearing aids to learn how to say all these things she's telling us about now with her hands! :)
L is at that 18 month old, language explosion period. She has a vocabulary of 16 words, and I'm sure there are more we don't understand yet. She speaks 2 words. So, let me clarify, she signs 16+ words... and she's imitating and using more literally every day. I remember when M was at this stage. She said new words pretty frequently, but nothing like the speed with which L is using new signs. She'll sit at the dinner table and copy 4 or 5 new signs as I tell her what she's eating for dinner or what J and M are saying.
So, we'll keep laying this foundation, she'll understand more, we'll be able to tell her more, earlier. and eventually, she'll use her hearing aids to learn how to say all these things she's telling us about now with her hands! :)
Friday, May 14, 2010
Why I am sold on ASL!
We tried it, Auditory Verbal therapy...
I'm sure it works for some families, why else would it have gained so many devout followers. It's just not for my family.
Imagine a three year old strapped in a chair for 45 minutes hearing the same word(s) over and over until he uttered some sort of sound in the desired response time. I watched as J got more and more frustrated with his therapy and the required homework. I saw him use signs with his therapist, and she reacted as if he hadn't communicated anything. I watched Jake slowly begin to repeat sounds he thought he was hearing, most completely wrong, that he heard over and over. Key word... slowly.
Fast forward to the deaf/hard of hearing program through the public school system. J gets to play and learn in a normal classroom setting, just with a focus on language, both signed and spoken. He made 3 year's progress in one calendar year on one of the preschool language tests his progress is measured with. He loved school then, and still loves it. He learns new vocabulary almost daily, his articulation is improving, his social skills are at age level now, and he's learning appropriate behavior and language to express himself. What a difference! I'm convinced that had we continued A-VT, we'd still be sitting in a chair fighting with him to say that week's targeted phrase.
We've also been instructed to work as hard as we can against the natural tendency for deaf kids' brains to develop very large visual areas. Deaf kids/people are visually oriented, why fight with that? They need that strength to make up for what their ears don't pick up. I actually feel like I would be doing them a disservice, robbing them of a strength they need. They aren't hearing, and no amount of therapy will change that. They'll still struggle with what we hearing people don't even have to think twice about. Give them the visual strength and they can compensate.
As for the theory that signing interferes with spoken language, there is plenty of evidence out there to suggest otherwise. And, most importantly, the opposite has proven true in our house. J learns a groupd of new signs, and about a month later, begins using the words appropriately, and vise wersa. As the studies of bilingual children has shown, one language boosts the other, and the children learn to differentiate the two as they become increasingly fluent in each. ASL is just another language. I doubt anyone would object if we were teaching our children English and french from birth, so why not English and ASL?
Aside from all of the great benefits of being bilingual, signing is a necessity for us. There was an immediate relief of tension in our home the year we started learning sign language. Bath time, bedtime, pool days, and any days we couldn't or didn't use J's hearing aids were so much easier! What a relief to communicate - such a simple, taken-for-granted thing! These times alone would convince me to learn at least enough singing to "get by". Furthermore, there's no guarantee their hearing loss won't progress to total deafness one day. Where would we be then if we haven't learned any sign language??!
I'm sure it works for some families, why else would it have gained so many devout followers. It's just not for my family.
Imagine a three year old strapped in a chair for 45 minutes hearing the same word(s) over and over until he uttered some sort of sound in the desired response time. I watched as J got more and more frustrated with his therapy and the required homework. I saw him use signs with his therapist, and she reacted as if he hadn't communicated anything. I watched Jake slowly begin to repeat sounds he thought he was hearing, most completely wrong, that he heard over and over. Key word... slowly.
Fast forward to the deaf/hard of hearing program through the public school system. J gets to play and learn in a normal classroom setting, just with a focus on language, both signed and spoken. He made 3 year's progress in one calendar year on one of the preschool language tests his progress is measured with. He loved school then, and still loves it. He learns new vocabulary almost daily, his articulation is improving, his social skills are at age level now, and he's learning appropriate behavior and language to express himself. What a difference! I'm convinced that had we continued A-VT, we'd still be sitting in a chair fighting with him to say that week's targeted phrase.
We've also been instructed to work as hard as we can against the natural tendency for deaf kids' brains to develop very large visual areas. Deaf kids/people are visually oriented, why fight with that? They need that strength to make up for what their ears don't pick up. I actually feel like I would be doing them a disservice, robbing them of a strength they need. They aren't hearing, and no amount of therapy will change that. They'll still struggle with what we hearing people don't even have to think twice about. Give them the visual strength and they can compensate.
As for the theory that signing interferes with spoken language, there is plenty of evidence out there to suggest otherwise. And, most importantly, the opposite has proven true in our house. J learns a groupd of new signs, and about a month later, begins using the words appropriately, and vise wersa. As the studies of bilingual children has shown, one language boosts the other, and the children learn to differentiate the two as they become increasingly fluent in each. ASL is just another language. I doubt anyone would object if we were teaching our children English and french from birth, so why not English and ASL?
Aside from all of the great benefits of being bilingual, signing is a necessity for us. There was an immediate relief of tension in our home the year we started learning sign language. Bath time, bedtime, pool days, and any days we couldn't or didn't use J's hearing aids were so much easier! What a relief to communicate - such a simple, taken-for-granted thing! These times alone would convince me to learn at least enough singing to "get by". Furthermore, there's no guarantee their hearing loss won't progress to total deafness one day. Where would we be then if we haven't learned any sign language??!
Thursday, May 13, 2010
"As an educational interpreter and a family member of deaf people, I have seen that when a parent finds out their child is deaf, they are shocked and dumbfounded. They do not know what to do. Then the first person they come into contact with is usually a doctor. The doctor is well meaning, but only looks at the child as a medical model. This means the child has a problem that needs to be fixed. The parents want a child like themselves. They have had no experience with the deaf community." --
I came across this post as I was exploring my google search, "deaf kids with hearing parents" the other day. This pretty much sums up our experience with our deaf children. People who have no contact with the Deaf community, or even experience with deaf people at all want to "fix" and make the kids as "normal" as possible, i.e. getting hearing aids and cochear implants, intense speech therapy, no signing, or signing only temporarily as a bridge. Our doctors and certain professionals definitely communicated to us that the best treatment possible for deaf people was fixing their hearing, i.e. cochlear implants and auditory verbal therapy in our case.
While I can't deny that I was excited when we first found out that both of our children's hearing is within or close to "normal" limits on their audiograms, I have since learned that there is another way. We now have deaf friends who have taught me how they've adapted in a hearing world, and everything that our children will have access to even without the benefit of their hearing aids. I think back, and am so thankful to have come across the people we did, both deaf and hearing, who have shaped our communication and education approaches with our children. The clarity I have now is in such contrast to how unsure I was of which way to go and who to believe.
Which decision did we make that we are so sure of? We are trying to give our kids the best of both worlds. We are all learning ASL and as much about the Deaf community as possible. (A challenge considering we are hearing! Luckily, we've met some great people now.) We are also trying to maximize J and L's residual hearing and teach them to listen and speak as well as they can. As parents, our challenge is to stay ahead of J, who is 5 now, as he learns ASL at school, so that we can raise him and his sisters in a bilingual household. It seems to be working; L is 18 months and signs some words, while she speaks a few others. It just seems to me that one extreme or the other isn't good for people with some hearing, so I'm trying to help my kids capitalize on both their deafness and their hearing ability.
The rest of the article I found follows:
Why Don't Some Hearing Parents of Deaf Children Use Sign Language?
Some Parents Do Not (and Perhaps Will Not Ever) Use Sign Language
By Jamie Berke, About.com Guide
Updated April 26, 2009
About.com Health's Disease and Condition content is reviewed by our Medical Review Board
.See More About:sign language blog postsgrowing up deafparenting deaf children
Sponsored Links
Sign Language Interpreter
Find Top Human Services Programs To Earn A Degree On Your Own Time.
www.Degrees-HumanServices.com
Does Your Child Have ADD?
ADD Tutors and Help With Learning. Visit the Suwanee GA Center Today.
www.BrainBalanceCenters.com
American Sign Language
Professional Interpreting Services Premier Service Provider
www.medleyinterpreters.com
Deafness Ads
Learning ASL
Deaf Signs
ASL Interpreter
Child Learning
Deaf Club
Sometimes, hearing parents do not learn sign language to communicate with their deaf children, even when sign language is the child's primary means of communication. Or, if they do learn it, their mastering of it is minimal. These parents may have their reasons for not learning sign language or becoming fluent in it. However, the resulting communication gap has been known to harm both familial relations and academic progress of deaf children.
This scenario was even the theme of an out-of-print children's book, Dina, the Deaf Dinosaur. In Dina, forest animals discover a crying deaf dinosaur. She ran away from home because her parents did not want her to learn sign language.
A related question was posted to the About.com Deafness Forum:
"One thing I keep seeing repeated is the statement that "many parents won't learn sign language." Why would a parent refuse to learn sign language to communicate with their own deaf child if sign language is a primary means of communication for that child?" --About.com User
Several forum users responded, giving examples from their or others' experiences:
"I had a deaf friend. Her father tried to learn sign, her mother refused. My friend did not learn ASL until she was 14 and even then, the friend who taught her [how to sign] had to do so in secrecy. My friend grew up very angry and hostile. Some parents, like my friend's mom, may feel guilt for creating a flawed child and learning sign would reinforce the guilt." --skwish
"As an educational interpreter and a family member of deaf people, I have seen that when a parent finds out their child is deaf, they are shocked and dumbfounded. They do not know what to do. Then the first person they come into contact with is usually a doctor. The doctor is well meaning, but only looks at the child as a medical model. This means the child has a problem that needs to be fixed. The parents want a child like themselves. They have had no experience with the deaf community." -- eduterp00
"I am a deaf education teacher. We have 17 students. Out of all those parents, none are deaf and only one family signs. The family that signs [belongs to] our only student that is on grade level in all subjects. We have a teacher that works with the family. We offer free sign classes year round. We send home sign dictionaries and signs for words that the students use in class. Still, the parents continue to ignore our pleas to learn how to communicate with their children. It breaks my heart [to hear] some of the things parents have asked me to do, such as "explain to my daughter why she started bleeding last night." --9nyfan
"There could be several reasons for hearing parents of deaf kids not learning ASL. One is that they just don't get it that deafness is not just the physical inability to hear, but that it involves a communication problem as well. Most hearing parents don't have any experience with deafness, and many in the medical field tell them to try to 'fix' their child. Another reason could be that they don't see learning ASL as a need-to-do thing. They work too many hours to devote time to learning, or they just flat out don't want to learn. Another reason could be that they are embarrassed to use signs in public. Perhaps the hearing parents think they can't learn ASL. The truth is that they can. They don't have to be interpreters, just learn ASL for communication purposes. "--flyinghands
"When I worked as an interpreter for the deaf and hard of hearing, I would hear that it was hard enough having a deaf child, do we have to learn sign also? Some think it's too hard to learn or [they are] just too busy. " --dragonkpr
"When my son lost his hearing, the first thing I thought was, how am I going to finish potty training him if we can't communicate? I took sign language classes as soon as I could. I soon found out that there are a lot of parents who don't learn sign language. I just can't imagine not being able to communicate life to my son. If you can't communicate with your child, how can you parent to the best of your ability. My son had a friend in school whose parent hasn't learned sign language. She was always saying that she needed to learn sign language, but never did. She always told me that her son was having discipline problems at home. I told her frankly that if she didn't learn sign language, she was going to lose her son." --signmom98
"I have seen deaf children who are needlessly lacking a language. Children who come into the school system with no communication skills, no basic understanding of life around them. Many not even able to answer a simple yes or no question, or know the names of their parents or siblings. The parent's excuse for their lack of language or communication? The top reasons given are usually, 'Oh, he/she understands us at home,' 'He/she can hear more than he lets on,' 'We really want him/her to learn to talk,' 'Our doctor/audiologist/SLP told us not to,' 'It's hard to learn sign language,' 'I don't have time to take any classes,' the list goes on and on. Then the parents lament about how their child is so far behind and blame the deafness - or the professionals working with them, never what they themselves are or aren't doing!" -- codacat
"Growing up, my best friend had a progressive hearing loss and wanted to learn sign language. Her parents wouldn't hear of it! They were too embarrassed and told her she could hear 'well enough' and needed to speak, and that sign language would only cause her to weaken her vocal skills. Together we began sign classes on the sly. Of course, we eventually got caught and she was so severely punished that she never learned another sign. Ironically, I continued studying and became an interpreter." - About.com User
"I have seen several deaf families where the deaf person is the only one in the household that knows sign language. In all cases but one, there is just a general lack of communication and there are very few attempts at actual communication. When asked why ASL was not learned, the replies are the same: They always meant to learn and wanted to learn ASL but never did. In one case, I witnessed something amazing. The family claims that they 'don't need' sign language to communicate, but can't ask the deaf person how their day was." -- About.com User
I came across this post as I was exploring my google search, "deaf kids with hearing parents" the other day. This pretty much sums up our experience with our deaf children. People who have no contact with the Deaf community, or even experience with deaf people at all want to "fix" and make the kids as "normal" as possible, i.e. getting hearing aids and cochear implants, intense speech therapy, no signing, or signing only temporarily as a bridge. Our doctors and certain professionals definitely communicated to us that the best treatment possible for deaf people was fixing their hearing, i.e. cochlear implants and auditory verbal therapy in our case.
While I can't deny that I was excited when we first found out that both of our children's hearing is within or close to "normal" limits on their audiograms, I have since learned that there is another way. We now have deaf friends who have taught me how they've adapted in a hearing world, and everything that our children will have access to even without the benefit of their hearing aids. I think back, and am so thankful to have come across the people we did, both deaf and hearing, who have shaped our communication and education approaches with our children. The clarity I have now is in such contrast to how unsure I was of which way to go and who to believe.
Which decision did we make that we are so sure of? We are trying to give our kids the best of both worlds. We are all learning ASL and as much about the Deaf community as possible. (A challenge considering we are hearing! Luckily, we've met some great people now.) We are also trying to maximize J and L's residual hearing and teach them to listen and speak as well as they can. As parents, our challenge is to stay ahead of J, who is 5 now, as he learns ASL at school, so that we can raise him and his sisters in a bilingual household. It seems to be working; L is 18 months and signs some words, while she speaks a few others. It just seems to me that one extreme or the other isn't good for people with some hearing, so I'm trying to help my kids capitalize on both their deafness and their hearing ability.
The rest of the article I found follows:
Why Don't Some Hearing Parents of Deaf Children Use Sign Language?
Some Parents Do Not (and Perhaps Will Not Ever) Use Sign Language
By Jamie Berke, About.com Guide
Updated April 26, 2009
About.com Health's Disease and Condition content is reviewed by our Medical Review Board
.See More About:sign language blog postsgrowing up deafparenting deaf children
Sponsored Links
Sign Language Interpreter
Find Top Human Services Programs To Earn A Degree On Your Own Time.
www.Degrees-HumanServices.com
Does Your Child Have ADD?
ADD Tutors and Help With Learning. Visit the Suwanee GA Center Today.
www.BrainBalanceCenters.com
American Sign Language
Professional Interpreting Services Premier Service Provider
www.medleyinterpreters.com
Deafness Ads
Learning ASL
Deaf Signs
ASL Interpreter
Child Learning
Deaf Club
Sometimes, hearing parents do not learn sign language to communicate with their deaf children, even when sign language is the child's primary means of communication. Or, if they do learn it, their mastering of it is minimal. These parents may have their reasons for not learning sign language or becoming fluent in it. However, the resulting communication gap has been known to harm both familial relations and academic progress of deaf children.
This scenario was even the theme of an out-of-print children's book, Dina, the Deaf Dinosaur. In Dina, forest animals discover a crying deaf dinosaur. She ran away from home because her parents did not want her to learn sign language.
A related question was posted to the About.com Deafness Forum:
"One thing I keep seeing repeated is the statement that "many parents won't learn sign language." Why would a parent refuse to learn sign language to communicate with their own deaf child if sign language is a primary means of communication for that child?" --About.com User
Several forum users responded, giving examples from their or others' experiences:
"I had a deaf friend. Her father tried to learn sign, her mother refused. My friend did not learn ASL until she was 14 and even then, the friend who taught her [how to sign] had to do so in secrecy. My friend grew up very angry and hostile. Some parents, like my friend's mom, may feel guilt for creating a flawed child and learning sign would reinforce the guilt." --skwish
"As an educational interpreter and a family member of deaf people, I have seen that when a parent finds out their child is deaf, they are shocked and dumbfounded. They do not know what to do. Then the first person they come into contact with is usually a doctor. The doctor is well meaning, but only looks at the child as a medical model. This means the child has a problem that needs to be fixed. The parents want a child like themselves. They have had no experience with the deaf community." -- eduterp00
"I am a deaf education teacher. We have 17 students. Out of all those parents, none are deaf and only one family signs. The family that signs [belongs to] our only student that is on grade level in all subjects. We have a teacher that works with the family. We offer free sign classes year round. We send home sign dictionaries and signs for words that the students use in class. Still, the parents continue to ignore our pleas to learn how to communicate with their children. It breaks my heart [to hear] some of the things parents have asked me to do, such as "explain to my daughter why she started bleeding last night." --9nyfan
"There could be several reasons for hearing parents of deaf kids not learning ASL. One is that they just don't get it that deafness is not just the physical inability to hear, but that it involves a communication problem as well. Most hearing parents don't have any experience with deafness, and many in the medical field tell them to try to 'fix' their child. Another reason could be that they don't see learning ASL as a need-to-do thing. They work too many hours to devote time to learning, or they just flat out don't want to learn. Another reason could be that they are embarrassed to use signs in public. Perhaps the hearing parents think they can't learn ASL. The truth is that they can. They don't have to be interpreters, just learn ASL for communication purposes. "--flyinghands
"When I worked as an interpreter for the deaf and hard of hearing, I would hear that it was hard enough having a deaf child, do we have to learn sign also? Some think it's too hard to learn or [they are] just too busy. " --dragonkpr
"When my son lost his hearing, the first thing I thought was, how am I going to finish potty training him if we can't communicate? I took sign language classes as soon as I could. I soon found out that there are a lot of parents who don't learn sign language. I just can't imagine not being able to communicate life to my son. If you can't communicate with your child, how can you parent to the best of your ability. My son had a friend in school whose parent hasn't learned sign language. She was always saying that she needed to learn sign language, but never did. She always told me that her son was having discipline problems at home. I told her frankly that if she didn't learn sign language, she was going to lose her son." --signmom98
"I have seen deaf children who are needlessly lacking a language. Children who come into the school system with no communication skills, no basic understanding of life around them. Many not even able to answer a simple yes or no question, or know the names of their parents or siblings. The parent's excuse for their lack of language or communication? The top reasons given are usually, 'Oh, he/she understands us at home,' 'He/she can hear more than he lets on,' 'We really want him/her to learn to talk,' 'Our doctor/audiologist/SLP told us not to,' 'It's hard to learn sign language,' 'I don't have time to take any classes,' the list goes on and on. Then the parents lament about how their child is so far behind and blame the deafness - or the professionals working with them, never what they themselves are or aren't doing!" -- codacat
"Growing up, my best friend had a progressive hearing loss and wanted to learn sign language. Her parents wouldn't hear of it! They were too embarrassed and told her she could hear 'well enough' and needed to speak, and that sign language would only cause her to weaken her vocal skills. Together we began sign classes on the sly. Of course, we eventually got caught and she was so severely punished that she never learned another sign. Ironically, I continued studying and became an interpreter." - About.com User
"I have seen several deaf families where the deaf person is the only one in the household that knows sign language. In all cases but one, there is just a general lack of communication and there are very few attempts at actual communication. When asked why ASL was not learned, the replies are the same: They always meant to learn and wanted to learn ASL but never did. In one case, I witnessed something amazing. The family claims that they 'don't need' sign language to communicate, but can't ask the deaf person how their day was." -- About.com User
Monday, May 3, 2010
Then and Now
Just a hearing mom raising 3 children, 2 of which are deaf. J, 5 1/2 years old, is deaf, M, 3 1/2 years old, is hearing, and L, 18 months old, is deaf.
When we found out our son was deaf, we felt thrown into a new world, the Deaf World, and had no idea what to do, which way to go, who to follow. I'm hoping this blog can reach and help even one parent who finds themselves in that position.
J's story in a nutshell:
J was born in 2004, passed his newborn hearing screening along with all the other prenatal and newborn tests we took. We were rolling along, he, his daddy, and I... J was a happy, "easy" baby, a good sleeper, played well by himself, smiled at us, and said his first word (mama) at about 9 months. His vocabulary slowly increased, by 15 months, his babbling included 5 or 6 different consonant and vowel sounds. No signs to indicate any delays...
At his 18 month health check, I mentioned his lack of new sounds since he had said those first few. He hadn't produced any more words either. The doctor told us he was still well within "normal" developmental timetables, and that furthermore, boys sometimes jsut take their time talking. We waited, and waited, and talked to him and read to him every day. The same scenario played out at his 2 year health check.
At his 3 year appointment, we demanded they do a hearing test. He failed in both ears, we were referred to an ENT and audiologist, and they rest has been our journey navigating the new world of Deaf. Our 2nd daughter, L, failed her newborn hearing screening, and started seeing J's audiologist right away. She's had hearing aids since she was 4 months old, and has learned ASL and English since birth.
So many emotions are involved when you as a hearing parent find out your children are deaf. You have this image of how your children and your life will be and for those of us who have been limited to a hearing community, it includes hearing babies. The loss of that is real, and the adjustment is hard and confusing. We found that the hardest struggle wasn't learning to communicate with our children and come to grips with their deafness, but navigating all of the "expert" advice and schools of thought on how deaf children should be raised and educated. We were supposed to commit to a method of communication, and should we choose the wrong one, we would have wasted even more of those precious early childhood language acquiring years. And, we had the guilt of not insisting on finding Jake's diagnosis sooner than we did. There's also the pressure from family and friends about the choices we were and weren't making. And, what's becoming increasingly apparent is the ignorance of the general public about deafness - the pitying looks and comments get old.
Fast forward 2 1/2 years...
We are confident in our choices of education and communication, we have a few deaf friends, and we are on our way to being fluent in ASL. More importantly, my eyes have been opened to a whole world that I never knew was here. Of course, I knew deaf people were around, but I had no idea what their daily struggles and triumphs were. Now, I am determined to make the hearing world a more deaf-friendly place. I am learning more and more that huge strides have been made in the last few decades for the Deaf Community, but there's still a long way to go. After all, "Deaf people can do everything hearing people can do but hear".
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)